Child Behaviour Problems - Changing Child Behaviour

Is your child in need of a time out? Time outs can be an effective way to manage misbehavior.

So, how can we use the time-out method?

Utilizing a time out starts with you (the parent/s) deciding ahead of time what kind of behaviours are not acceptable and should result in a time-out. As a general rule, in my house - tantrums and aggressive or dangerous behaviour warrant a timeout.

You will then need to specify a location for the time-out to be served. Places that are seemingly uninteresting for children make the best time out zones, a kitchen chairs or a corners that are a little out of the way and not frightening are perfect. Should the case arise that you are in need of a time out zone when you are out side of your home, you should consider using a car (not on a hot day) or a nearby park bench or picnic area as a time-out zone.

It is very important to remember that when your child behaves in an unacceptable manner that you clearly and simply explain to the child why the behaviour is unacceptable and first give your child a warning that if the behaviour doesn't stop, you will give them a time out.

It is a very good idea to track how long your child has been in the time-out zone. As a general rule, Time outs should be brief. As a guide, 1 minute for each year of age is sufficient and effective. Always remain within sight or at least within earshot of the child, but try not to talk to them and do not let them talk to you or others.

We all know that some kids find it difficult to stay still, even for a minute, so if your child leaves the time-out zone, hastily return him or her to the zone and if need be, reset the timer. Naturally, when the time-out has come to an end, let the child go and play.

Your child's changing behaviour can be managed and there are many useful child behaviour management methods that are effective. The time out method is just one such method that can help parents to better manage Changing Child Behaviour.


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Child Behaviour Problems – 10 Reasons Why Children Misbehave

There is usually a very good reason why a child misbehaves and we can deal with it more effectively and discipline, if necessary, if we understand what is causing the problem. Understanding child behaviour problems is fundamental to finding the best approach to handling these problems.

There are many possible reasons why a child misbehaves. Here are 10 of the most common reasons with a brief note on how deal with each one. Bad behaviour is not limited to these of course.

Children need to feel that they belong - to you, the family a group of friends, so it is important that you assure them that they are still part of the family, even when they misbehave.

Children misbehave to get attention – any attention is better than no attention to a child, so give your attention when a child is behaving, so that they do not misbehave to get that attention.

Children misbehave when they are upset – any changes to a child's normal routine can cause upsets to occur, so reassure them and show them how to adapt to the new circumstances.

Children misbehave when they feel unloved – a child that knows he is loved will want to please you by behaving well. Furthermore, a loving relationship is essential in order for positive discipline to guide your child's behaviour.

Children misbehave as a way to get what they want. – if bad behaviour has worked in the past to get them what they want, it is worth trying again. So make sure that you do not inadvertently reward bad behaviour.

Children misbehave when they feel inadequate or lack confidence - they may act up when afraid to try out new things in case they make a mistake, so help your child understand that everyone makes mistakes.

Children misbehave when they do not feel well, are hungry or are tired – make sure that they eat healthy foods, get plenty of exercise and between 8 – 12 hours sleep each night.

Children misbehave when they are disappointed – a child is easily upset when they are disappointed and quickly show signs of irritability. We need to accept their feelings and help them to cope with their disappointment.

Children misbehave when they are discouraged – we are sometimes quick to admonish bad behaviour but often forget to praise good behaviour. Children need praise and approval even for small things and this helps to prevent them misbehaving to get attention.

Children misbehave when imitating their parents – children are great mimics and readily copy what adults do, so we must strive to be good role models and always admit when we make a mistake.

You can love your child without accepting their bad behaviour. Explain that they do not have to earn your love by behaving well, you love them anyway. But emphasise that it is because you love them that you want them to know how to behave properly. Encourage them to talk about their thoughts and feelings, it strengthens the loving bond between you.

Good parenting is more important today than it has ever been due to the ever growing influence of outside influences such as the media. Discipline is one of the most important facets of good parenting and understanding what causes child behaviour problems is fundamental to implementing the fairest and most appropriate form of discipline.

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Childhood Behavior and How to Solve it

It is helpful to have an idea of childhood behavior so that you will understand how your child’s behaviour might alter as they develop, so that you can be aware of what is normal and when you should be concerned .Many types of normal behaviour can be problematic, and your tolerance levels for these may vary more with your mood than with the child’s behaviour itself. A good understanding of normal difficult behaviour can help you respond appropriately and more sensitively to your child at the time when they need you most.

Children are not all the same

All children vary and develop in their own childhood behavior way; your child may be different from their peers, but whether they will be considered normal will depend on the expectations of those around them, example a typical “bookworm” may bullied in a non-academic environment or highly valued in an intellectual one. A child who is more interested in football team work may be seen as a hero in local community, even if they can’t sit still in class and yet would be deemed a failure in a strict academic school or family.
A change of environment may be the solution if your child is not tolerated for being different it is up to you to encourage your child to take pride in what they are capable of praising them consistently for any achievements , whether they happen to be in football or maths .

Variation between cultures

What is considered to be `normal ` will vary not only from one child to another, but also from one family or culture to another, if your child is from a different culture or background from their peers, they may be less tolerated simply because of the difference. In some cultures and families, behaviour that is accepted normal in a boy would not be acceptable in a girl; Boys may be encouraged to be macho, aggressive and dominant.

Increasingly, today families are more mobile and more multi-ethnic, They are less likely to have a support network, and more likely to be exposed to culture differences, In this context especially if you have moved to a new area, your child may be different from their peers and be teased as a result, they may almost certainly want to be like all the others and may put themselves down for being different, it is up to you to encourage them to be proud of how and who they are because their childhood behavior may seem strange to them at times.

Normal developmental millstones

It is helpful to keep a watch over your child’s development milestones (for example, learning to walk) so that you can catch any problems early on. If you are worried about their development, consult a health professional and / or their teacher for advice.

Children with developmental problems often have more childhood behaviour problems

Understanding your child

Children need to have things explained to them at their own level of understanding, it is important to check that any task you set for your child is manageable and appropriate to the stage of development they are currently and that they understand what you expect of them. Often, what appears to be disobedience is simply misunderstanding, repeating the same command louder won’t work in this situation, you need to try another approach.

Younger children usually think you mean exactly what you say, if you lose your temper and make an idle threat to send them to a children’s home, for example, they will remember it and believe it, even if you have no such intention!, similarly young children may not have a clear understanding of difference between right and wrong so although it is appropriate to teach them this, Shouting and punishing them for bad behaviour without clear explanation, will only bewilder and upset them which only present more childhood behavior problems later on.

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